zan: (Misfits: Alisha)
I just want to say I love you all.
zan: (Other: Broken)
Looking at my 20 year old self? I was a whiny, insecure little brat.
zan: (Other: Homework/IM)
If you'd asked me two and a half years ago, what I'd be doing right now, it wouldn't have come close to what I'm actually doing.

That's not quite true. I would have said one thing - what I'm actually doing - and meant something else completely. I would have meant that I would be likely still stuck in telemarketing positions. Crappy office jobs that always seem to screw me over in one way or another. Day after day of mindless repetition where all I want to do is go home and sleep and I have little motivation or interest in anything beyond the day-to-day.

Two years and four months ago, I found out I was losing my job. Not because of anything I did, but just because they were closing the center in Tucson. By a miracle I'm still in shock about, I had managed to clear off most of my debt and had just enough money to apply for the summer session. Not only that, I was able to get financial aid. Those were a long few months.

Honestly, I was scared out of my wits the first time I went to class and thereafter for a few weeks. I'd completely bombed on the last college experience. Was I going to do it again? To some degree, I can answer that with a yes. I'm a slacker. I get the assignments done at the last possible moment and sometimes that leads to a slightly lower grade than I might otherwise get. I can, however, compare that with my previous experience, where I would skip classes for half the semester and then go in once or twice just because I felt like I should. I always started with the best of intentions until a lack of motivation caused me to miss a class. And then two. And then more. By that point, it was far too late to catch up.

Now? Sure I'm scared. I'm overwhelmed with the idea that I'm going to have to read upwards of twenty novels over the course of a semester and who knows how many handouts. With the fact that the damned Lit Theory book I so dreaded last semester is required in one class and recommended for another one. That I not only have to learn Spanish (I still haven't particularly studied or caught up this summer) but Old English as well.

But hey. I got a 3.5 GPA last semester. This time around, I can at least make that a 3.75, right?
zan: (Default)
So, first of all, I wake up and it's REALLY hot in here. Apparently our AC isn't working properly. It should be 70-something and it's 80-something instead. Normally, this wouldn't be too bad, but it's monsoon season, which means humid heat.

Second, and this is the doozy, I got my mail this morning and found that I had a notice from the fraud protection service I've been using. It came through my bank and I got it for the credit report and decided to keep it in case any old debts came back to haunt me. This actually ended up happening, which makes me glad I got it. What makes me doubly glad is that when I opened the letter today, it said I have a past due account from Citi Cards. I've only ever had four credit cards and none of them were Citi.

Trying to get through their phone system was annoying. First they needed an account number and wouldn't do a 'dial 0 and get the operator'. I kept trying to track down another number and got zip. The 800 number for the fraud protection service was down because of the holidays, which meant that I couldn't get an account number from them.

Finally, I tried a few other tricks that I learned from my telemarketing days. Double 0 or # usually work. A single # brought me to touch-only service and a second # brought me to a customer service rep. I go through the 'I don't have an account here' and she goes 'yes, you do' and I give her my SSN and sure enough, she brings up an account. Then she asks for confirmation with my mother's maiden name. And here we get to the snag: it wasn't my mom's name. V-something. They wouldn't give me the complete name.

So I get sent through to the fraud department, only the transfer gets screwed up and I get disconnected and have to call back. Another hassle. This time, they tell me that while there is an account, it's not under my name.

Cue HUGE sigh of relief.

It means that I can dispute with the credit agencies just fine and all it'll take is time.
zan: (Default)
Last night I had a dream. Yes, this is actually kind of surprising as I only tend to have dreams in clusters every few months. I actually dreamed that I was taking my Honors Seminar final and not only did I forget to bring the PDF's with me for everyone, I completely freaked out when it comes to timing when I'm going to change what I'm writing in order to do something else.

In short, I'm worried about the final and it's in a week and a day.

Also, I'm not sold on my glasses. I'm going to give myself an hour to try to get adjusted to them (as I just woke up), but if they're going to give me a headache and annoy me, I'm going to have to go back to my original glasses. Just for another week.

I know I've been a bit of a bitch the last few weeks and I apologize to pretty much everyone. All I can say is that it'll be over soon, for better or worse.
zan: (Other: What the Fuck)
Let's set the scene.

Friday, I had class, grabbed a coffee, and went to study and do tags. I grabbed BK and about three minutes in, my stomach decided to be majorly unhappy with me. To the point where I didn't think I'd be able to ride the entire way home, let alone bike home from the bus.

So I asked for a ride.

Sunday afternoon, I come back to campus to have an appointment with my partner for an oral Linguistics report. Things go fine, I go back to study for a few hours, and leave twenty minutes before the bus is supposed to show. It gives me time to stop, grab a soda, and grab my bike.

Except there is no bike.

I have a routine and sometimes I mix it up, so I look in the three or four spots I normally park it. Nothing. I look again and then a third time. Absolutely nothing.

This is the point I call the police.

So, as far as I know, my bike's been stolen. I'm going to look tomorrow again every since conceivable spot that I could have parked it, just to make sure that I didn't try a shortcut, but I'm pretty sure I parked it where I always do, which means it's gone.

Then (oh, did you think that was the only thing to happen, silly person?) [ profile] bugly42's parents take me out to this amazing Italian restaurant to cheer me up. The food is always great and I order what I always get: spaghettini with baby clams in red sauce. It takes about fifteen minutes to get our salads and there are onions on them. Rob (the dad) is allergic to onions and the salads go back. Then Sherry (the mom) finds an onion in her salad and it goes back. The third time her salad comes back, it has blue cheese instead of ranch.

The manager comes over and, while he's talking, Rob realizes that while he didn't taste the onion, he must have had some. Did I mention he's violently allergic? No, he doesn't die or have to go to the hospital, but that's only because he caught it before he could have any more.

Really, this weekend can just end right now.
zan: (Basic: Studying)
So, status on life:

2 tests down and I actually feel like I did okay on them. Both of them were Lit and I actually felt sort of prepared for them before going in. This is good.

1 test to go, in Psychology, and it's the test that I don't feel prepared AT ALL for, so I'm panicking a little and I'm going to be spending the next two days studying my ass off.

My computer has officially crapped out on me. Well, not the computer and everything inside, but the cover hinge has gone again, which means that I think I'm going to put in a call TONIGHT instead of tomorrow, just to make sure they can be here by Friday. I really, really want my laptop fixed and in working order before the holidays begin. Mostly because I know I won't have time once they're over because of school starting back up.

Uhh, tomorrow I'm going to be doing a rewrite of Kon's app to send in to Squot for a final beta and it should be out to the mods by the end of the weekend, I think. And then I crash and crash hard. The day after my tests end (Friday, unless I'm really lazy), expect to not see me around at all. I'm going to be hiding with the DS and library books and will just be taking a much needed sanity break.
zan: (Other: Gemini)
You know what I never knew about myself? I have a lisp. I'm listening to the lecture from my last Lit class, in order to finish studying, and I'm hearing myself and I have a noticeable (to me, at least) lisp.


Who would have guessed?
zan: (Text: To the Power of Meh)
The ways this day sucks:

1. I got maybe five hours of sleep, all told. Maybe less. I'd have to ask Christina.
2. I woke up and another small piece of my tooth - which has been slowly falling apart and which I'm unable to fix due to lack of insurance - is gone. I don't want to know how much fixing it is going to cost.
3. I brought my lit book to school with me. And then promptly left it at the bus stop. Of course, when I realized this and went back to grab it, it was nowhere to be found.
4. I had a nagging feeling when I got to school. You know the above mentioned lit book? I have a paper due in class today. Which I completely forgot about.

And I haven't even been awake three hours, yet. Dear god, kill me.

ETA: I'm an idiot and I can't tell the dates. It wasn't due until Thursday. And today she knocked it back even further. I'm going to take the later bus back, get food, and buy the book. If I don't hear back in two days, then I'll have bought the book for real. Oh well. And I think I might have a lead on dental insurance until I go through the school.
zan: (SG-1: Cowardly Lion (Daniel))
God. So. My day, beginning with when I got home last night.

I never ended up doing my Writing assignment, so I attempted to get it done. Almost as soon as I was done eating, [ profile] dutchesschaotic and [ profile] frogmajick pounced me and demanded I watch 200 with them. Not that I objected at all. In fact, I retrashed my room in order to find the disk it was on.

It was great. Of course it was great. It would have been better if I were there for the first time [ profile] dutchesschaotic watched it - *glare* - but it was as perfect as always.

Then I believe [ profile] frogmajick had to go away to deal with kidlet issues, so I attempted to write while I watched Memento Mori. Val. C'mon. It's a gimme. (*Needs more Stargate icons*)

She ended up coming back and we watched it AGAIN. We talked a little more while I tried to write, but I had a headache and ended up falling asleep on her for about an hour. I had about 200 words written.

I set my alarm for about 6:30 and woke up at 7. When I went to go check how many copies (1 for each student in the class) I needed, I noticed that the assignment wasn't generalized talking to an audience. It was specific to a class or group of professionals. So, scrap the 200 words I already had. I needed at least 500 new ones.

I scrambled, I wrote, and I don't know how, but an hour later later, I had 830-something words and I actually had to trim about 90 words from my story. God I love adrenaline-fueled writing binges. Of course, now I'm paying for it and am horribly exhausted. I need more sleep. Maybe nap when I get home?

After I talk to [ profile] bugly42's parents.
zan: (Basic: Studying)
So, I had my first class today. I think I'll like it. The way he's set up the class is a lot like my Narrative Lit class semester, only with a lot less reading. A LOT less reading. This includes the projects, which are all papers, and have creative writing options to them. If he uses the same sheet that Pam gave me for last Narrative Lit, I'll crack up. What is amusing is that the Sci Fi guy from the Writing class last semester is in this class.

Also, the guy's from the New York/Boston area. And one of the guys in the class is from Connecticut.

Small, small world.

The Psychology class is the only (and first ever) web class I'm signed up for this semester. It looks like there's a lot of reading. I get to read the first 200 pages of the book in the first month. But the tests and quizzes are all multiple choice and the homework seems pretty simple.

So, all in all, a good start to this semester.
zan: (Basic: Sloth)
He's up. Walking around. Talking.


Time for bed.
zan: (Default)
Oi. Is my life ever simple? Can I never have a blissfully uncomplicated moment? If it isn't one thing, it's a million. If it's not that person, it's this other one. Of course, it could be worse. There could be more than two. But still...

This makes me sound like some drunken slut, but...oh, it would be fun.

:Smirks: Oh, would it be fun. Ex! I wanna go slutting around drunk! Help!

But seriously. My life can be so messed up sometimes. I mean, I'm uncomfortable around George, and who thought *that'd* happen. I'm hanging more around Ben and Ben and all them. Oh, and today was the first time I saw George since a week ago last Friday. Huh. Who'da thought it?
zan: (Default)
So why is George talking to me on Merissa's behalf? I mean, as far as I know, things were fine. I haven't talked to her or seen her since last Tuesday. And things seemed fine then. So what's changed? Why does she have me blocked? Why isn't she talking to me herself? Why?


Feb. 21st, 2003 09:29 pm
zan: (Default)
So, I had my first good cry in a long time in the Cowden computer lab. I have never had anyone belittle me like Kris did. In all my years of teasing, no one got to me like he did. I've trusted all of my friends not to betray me like he did. I've trusted them not to hurt me, as only they could. And now, I'm not sure, except for three of them, who I can trust. Because I thought that Kris would always be there and wouldn't do something like that. And I'm wrong. And now I'm going to be paranoid every single time I'm around people that aren't Tina, Angela, or George.


Nov. 12th, 2002 02:52 pm
zan: (pic#)
I just want to thank [ profile] caramiaculpa for giving me a code so that I can start up a journal. Not much happening with me, at the moment, except for the fact that I'm oversleeping horribly. I'm still struggling with the idea of not going to school next semester. In a way, it feels like I'm giving up, even though I know it's only a temporary break.

Oh well. Hello to everyone who bothers to read my journal.

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